


We’re Not Real

by castleofbooks



Category: Mystic Messenger
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Another Story spoilers, Drugs, F/M, Fluff, Love Triangles, MC likes to swear, Non-Con Elements (non sexual), Regret, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Tags to be added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:55:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21808540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castleofbooks/pseuds/castleofbooks
Summary: It’s a game and no one knows it yet. Until one day, MC figures out she’s been reset. Over and over. After giving up, she decides to try and break through and when she soon realizes that Saeyoung also knows, the two of them have to work together to figure out to how to stop them. They have 11 days before the next reset, can they possibly do it?
Relationships: Jaehee Kang / MC, Jihyun Kim / MC, Saeran Choi / Ray / MC, Saeyoung Choi / MC, Yoosung Kim / MC, Zen / MC, jumin han / mc
Comments: 10
Kudos: 25





	We’re Not Real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (update: 2/2/21) 
> 
> This hasn't been abandoned but i won't lie I haven't touched it in months, chapter two is currently being written. I'm in college so I have no free time to sit and write but I will try to get chapter 2 done asap

“This is where it ends, right?” MC thought as she laid exhausted on the same bed she had slept in, day in and day out. Countless resets, countless nights. Good endings, bad endings. Never getting far enough to escape this hellish void she was trapped in. Her eyes looked around the room, she met her gaze with the camera that was positioned in the corner. She sighed. “There’s no escape is there?” She said wondering if Seven could actually hear her. Her mind was filled with intruding thoughts of her previous lovers. She felt a tight knot in her chest as she numbingly thought about each one.  
  
Zen was her first, he was undeniably narcissistic, but there was an overshadowing presence of uncanny love that enveloped MC as she slowly fell for him. But as suddenly as it had started, it had faded to black. She didn’t know it was all a game, she didn’t know that by day 11 everything would suddenly disappear. She didn’t know how excruciatingly painful it would be to wake up, knowing, that the one person you had ever given yourself to no longer knew who you were. It was almost like she couldn’t breathe.

After that, she awoke without any previous memories. Her mind wiped clean. She was once again led to an apartment, thrown into a chatroom of masked strangers and then swooped up into an organization she willingly joined. This time, she picked Jaehee. The time they spent was filled with endearing realizations of freedom and unruly desires that led them down a path filled with enamored triumphs of endless support. But it never lasted long enough. Blackness took hold once more.  
  
It repeated. She still hadn’t caught on. MC found herself getting rather close to Jumin, finding small ways to inch closer and closer to his twisted heart. Her effervescence of clarity taking a toll on the man who believed in nothing more than a good business endeavor and an aged glass of wine. They ended up getting married. The blackness soon claimed another victim. Then it was Yoosung. He was adorably naive. The two of them spent their days arduously in love. They grew up before their own eyes, raptured in the presence of each other. A soft beguiling wave of firsts and lasts. And then it was gone.  
  
She even managed to wrap her pretty little fingers around V. The man she had come to know as nothing more than a bundle of pixels, not to be trusted, because of a secret he was hiding. Falling fealty to the words of an unknown man. His blinded love for a woman hath scorned, so bitter and cruel, yet undeniably addicting. His overwhelming denial that led him down a dark spiral of condemned thoughts of misery and pain. Your memories are gone faster than you could blink.  
  
Then there was ‘him’, he was draped in saturated bouts of warmth and love, his eyes reflecting fragments of a solemn future that neglected the sick and twisted truth that lay just beneath the fragile surface. He was everything and nothing. He was hers and she was his. A puppet to a puppeteer. Her delicate strings being pulled every which way. The pain that had convulsed thought her veins, suddenly setting ablaze, her eyes sparkling, and a sudden wash of thick liquids seeping out of hazy corners and swollen lips. His name was Ray.  
  
Lastly, she came to love a boy who was so infuriatingly hard to let go of. The emptiness MC felt as the days ticked on swelled though through her head, causing pain to ripple throughout her body. It was replaced by hope, a hope that MC clung onto. She didn’t want to give up. And although she still didn’t know about the endless loop she was stuck in, she felt connected when she happened upon Seven’s route. It was a sporadic spiral of emotions, pain, loss, and misery. This route had pushed MC to her breaking point, but it was always okay in the end because she got to be with the one she loved. Or so she thought.

This went on for what seemed like years. She had relived their stories over and over. Getting them to break, forcing them to succumb. MC knew the in’s and out’s of the game. After eventually catching on, she had realized something. She was alone. She didn’t know how silent the world around her felt, till she actually understood it. The silence was so deafening she couldn’t breathe at the thought of how long she had been trapped. How many years had she been a part of this mind-numbing void of seclusion? It wasn’t long till she figured out what was going on, that she had been living a lie this entire time. She couldn’t count how many routes, how many endings, how many resets she had encountered. She lost track after deciding that she wanted to end everything. That day was today.

* * *

It was only day one, everything was back to how it should be, no one was in love with her, no one was in danger (yet) and no one, not one single person in the goddamn RFA knew a thing. It was almost like she was reliving someone else’s sick memories. She didn’t ask for this, she didn’t need this. That was the torture that MC was forced to endure. She got the privilege of watching everyone she cared about spin through a cycle of love and heartbreak. Was this MC’s personal hell? Was any of it real? She threw herself back down on the bed. Her mind spun, causing her eyes to flutter before she opened them glaring up at the stark white ceiling. The room was dark, and she was still alone.  
  
“How many times has it been now?” She laughed to herself, a bit of craziness washing over the words as they came out. “How many more do I have to endure?” MC was tired. Not just physically, but emotionally. It started to take a toll on her mind when she finally figured out what was happening, that there was no happy ending. That everything was over before it started. That was the breaking point. That was the first time MC decided, life, or whatever you wanted to call this sick game, wasn’t worth it. There were times when all she wanted to do was fade into nothing, she didn’t want to exist anymore. But she never had a choice, not really.  
  
MC was starting to lose it. Her patience, her energy. All of it. Suddenly her phone rang. She knew exactly who, it wasn’t the first time or the 10th or 100th. This exhausting loop never ended. She had no idea how many times she got this call. She knew every word, every forced choice. But, today was different. She was finally over it. It was time to take matters into her own hands, because at the end of the day, what did it really matter? It was just a game, wasn’t it?

She picked up the phone and pressed accept. “What?” she groaned.

She figured out how to resist the system, probably a few resets ago, something she never thought she would be able to do. It started with forced options of thought. She wasn’t aware that the words she was saying were not her own, that they were preplanned lines of bullshit that meant nothing. They lacked any sort of real truth the moment they left her lips. But after spending countless times resetting, week after week, she started to realize something was wrong. It wasn’t sudden, more like a slow aching crawl of horror when MC soon discovered everything she thought she knew was a lie. The moment she put all the pieces together was the moment she broke.

Seven’s voice was annoyingly cheerful. “Rrrrrr. Rrrrr.” MC rolled her eyes. “Not this again…” she thought to herself sighing loudly. “Uhm, uh.. Your bank account has been used for a fun prank.” MC put the phone on speaker and tossed it next to her as she replayed the same conversation in her head. Repeating every word perfectly as they came out of Seven’s mouth. She turned on her side and waited for silence. She wanted to test something. Normally, MC would be programmed to reply with the same tiring shit that she always had, but this time she tried to break Seven. Again, what did it matter if everything was just a game?

“This is fucking bull shit.” She said rolling over on her back. But the same pre-planned words came out instead. She sighed. “Seven, just fucking listen to me…” she whined. Her mind was spinning. She just wanted this to end already. She needed someone, something, to know just how royally fucked she was.Nothing is more lonely than this. But, still nothing. He spoke again. Something about a phone. She didn’t even pay attention. There was silence again. She groaned. “Why can’t you just fucking listen to me, Seven. WHY. I am so sick of this shit. I am so tired, I just want to stop feeling all of this. I can’t handle this anymore…” Her heart was beating fast. She didn’t think she had any strength in her left. She just wanted to get through to someone, and if it was going to be anyone, it was going to be him.  
  
She could hear noises coming through the phone, it sounded like he was moving. The once so normal call that she had ingrained in her head was suddenly different. Normally the call continued on Seven explaining pointless bits of information, MC threatening to hang up. But this time, it didn’t. Something changed. “You know…” his voice was low but the tone was serious. MC’s eyes grew wide. She sat up instantly. She picked up the phone, took it off the speaker and held it close to her ear. “How?” she spoke softly into the phone.

“I’ve known for a while… but I didn’t know….I didn’t know you knew. Not until just now.” MC felt a pain envelop her body. She felt sick. “I-I need to see you”. She demanded. “I don’t care about the special security system, I don’t care that Saeran is out there, I don’t care.” Seven’s body ached when he heard MC say Saeran's name, she didn’t think MC had the nerve to say it. After everything, he’s done. MC continued. “I’m so fed up with this shit. We need to find a way….” her voice caught in her throat. “I need your help.” MC clung to the phone, replaying the words over and over in her head waiting for him to say something. “I’m leaving right now, don’t move.” And the line went dead.

MC fell backward on the bed, her heart racing, and her mind spinning in circles once again. Her eyes felt heavy and her body weak. “I love you…” she said softly, closing her eyes letting the darkness consume her whole.

* * *

Seven needed a plan. He sat at his desk fumbling for documents that were lying askew. Scanning over each one, taking in every word. Looking for something that could lead him in the right direction. He mulled over the idea of hurting Saeran. But all that did was leave a nauseous feeling in his stomach, and numbing pain in his head. He took a deep breath. He needed a way to get into the apartment before he could. Thinking about Saeran harming MC, made Seven’s skin burn. He glanced at his phone for a moment before picking it up and clicking on a familiar name. He was sure they didn’t know about the resets, he needed their help though.  
  
The phone’s familiar tone buzzed in his ear as he waited for the caller to pick up. _Click_. “What?” the voice said sharply. “Vanderwood… I need your help. I can’t explain it over the phone but I need to get to MC’s apartment right now. I know who the hacker is. I’ve known…” his words trailed off unexpectedly. The phone line went dead. Moments later the figure appeared. “Luciel, what is going on?” his tone still strong. “I need you to sit down, this is going to be long. Confusing even. We don’t have time but… I need you to know.” Vanderwood’s expression slightly faded from annoyance to confusion, a bit of worry hiding behind his furred eyebrows. “What’s going on with you?” he asked. Seven took a deep breath before spewing his crazy thoughts out. “None of us are real.”

The look that suddenly encased Vanderwood’s face was nothing short of serious. He started to laugh. “What the hell does that even mean, of course, we’re real. Are you okay? Seriously. I think the sugar has finally gone to your head.” Seven’s gaze dropped. His voice was low. “I have never been more serious in my life.” Seven lifted his eyes slightly. “You don’t think I know a program when I see one? It took a while, a long time actually. But it all started to make sense. We’re not real… this is all a game. Our lives have been reset, not once, not twice. But hundreds of times. I only recently figured it out. MC…. she figured it out way before anyone else. She’s the one who’s had it the worst. She needs my help. We have to put an end to this, to stop the world from resetting. I can’t stand to watch everyone I care about slip away…” His eyes had glossed over, a small tear running down Seven’s cheek. Vanderwood swallowed hard.  
  
“No… this, this is just… this is some fucked up prank isn’t it?” he said trying to hold back a wave of panic struck laughter. He swallowed hard before meeting eyes with Seven. “This… I don’t believe you. I can’t… what you’re saying… it’s hypocrisy. I’ll help you, Luciel, but… I don’t believe you in the slightest.” Seven looked up wiping away the tear. “Thank you… I’ll explain everything later, I know so much... But I need help, I need to take out the hacker… my…” he trailed off, he couldn’t admit that Saeran was the one doing this to her. “Do you have anything?” he said, his voice filled with pleas.

  
“I do. Follow me.”

* * *

  
Vanderwood and Seven shared the bunker for as long as Seven could logically piece together. Leading Seven down towards his part of the house they ended at a metal door of the long narrow hallway. Vanderwood fiddled with the buttons. _Click._ The door was open. The small room was lined with walls of various sorts of weapons, tools, and things Seven hadn’t recognized before. “Woah…” he said softly, admiring his new surroundings. “You really are prepared.” Vanderwood made a “tch” sound as he was opening a metal cabinet that also had a lock on it. “That’s not the half of it.” He said pulling out a hard plastic case. “This is what’s gonna help you stop the hacker. It won’t kill him, just knock him out for a few hours. Do what you need to do and be safe, you know the boss will have my head if anything happens to you.” Seven nodded as he took the case from Vanderwood. “Thank you.” And then he was gone.

Seven gathered everything he needed and headed out. It wasn’t long till he was outside the apartment. Little did his brother know, that a certain someone would be showing up to ruin everything. Seven opened the plastic container, quite hesitantly at first. He took a deep breath and then slowly pulled it open. Sitting neatly in front of him were two glass vials of tranq. The translucent liquid sloshed around as he examined them closer. He snatched the vials and placed them in his pocket as he prepared his next move. He had no idea where Saeran would be but he was ready.

He sat low in his car as he hacked into the security cameras that lined the building. It took a few moments but he moved from camera to camera scanning every inch of the building that he could see. He was getting more anxious as he checked each one and Saeran not appearing in any of them. It wasn’t until he spotted someone tucked into a corner on the 14th floor that he knew. He threw his laptop in the back and shoved his phone in his pocket.

On the other hand, MC was pacing the room. She wasn’t nervous, just impatient. She wasn’t afraid of death. Not anymore that is. It takes a lot out of someone after having experienced everything she has. Her heart races slightly of the thought of that undulating feeling of falling into nothingness but being slammed back down in the cold harsh reality of it all.“Where is he?” she groaned.

Seven dashed from his car, across the street and straight into the building. He managed to get up to the 13th floor before preparing a plan of attack. He was out of breath, and the heavy intakes of air caused his voice to slightly whine, he kept his sleeve over his mouth to muffle to the sound. He slowly crept up the stairs, but before he broke the threshold of the new floor he pulled out his phone and messaged MC.

  
**Seven:** Be prepared for anything.

He hit sent. A few moments later MC’s phone pinged.  
  
**MC:** Okay. 

Still, out of breath, he pressed himself against the wall slowly falling to the ground. Seven slipped his phone back into his pocket and peered his head around the corner. Situated in the middle of the hall was a gap, just big enough for someone to fit. There was an obnoxiously tall plant placed there for decor. That’s where he saw the hacker only moments before. He didn’t want to admit it, not quite yet, that it was his brother who was doing all of this. There was something burning deep inside Seven. He still couldn’t believe how any of this had happened, why him… why did Saeran have to be a part of this? He shook the thoughts away and focused his eyes on the apartment door, he figured Saeran was waiting for MC to try and leave, so that he could kidnap her but he wasn’t going to be expecting this.

Seven pulled out one of the vials from his pocket and carefully admired the beauty of it all. He silently laughed to himself. He knew this wasn’t real, none of it. But there was something alluring to the whole idea. After his heart rate slowed back down he managed himself back on his feet. Seven peered his face slightly around the corner. The hacker was now standing in plain sight. Back pressed against the wall. A phone in one hand, a knife in the other. He didn’t know what his next move was but he needed it to be quick. He slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone again. He pulled open the messenger app and sent a message to MC.  
  


**Seven:** I need you to distract him.  
  
**MC:** How?  
  
**Seven:** Make a loud noise? Push something over? Anything.  
  
**MC:** Fine, I’ll figure something out.   
  


Seven waited to see what she had in mind. He kept himself close enough so that when the time was right he could attack. Meanwhile, MC was thinking of a way to make a convincing enough distraction. She assumed he needed to break in, that was the only way this would work. She thought of something that would rile him up, something, he would never expect. After all, MC knew everything. She knew exactly what kind of person the hacker was, who was wrapped up in his pretty and sadistic little head.  
  
MC stationed herself directly in front of the door. He didn’t know that she knew he was out there, so what came next was a bit of a surprise. “Oh, Saeran…” she cooed. The hacker instantly jolted up from where he was relaxing, a surge of anger running through him. “How do you know that name?” he shouted.  
  
MC chuckled. “A little bird told me all about you… Mint Eye… your brother Saeyoung…” she sounded pleased with herself. The hacker, on the other hand, was flaming. “OPEN THIS DOOR.” His words were enveloped in fury. “No, I don’t think I will.” MC laughed again. “Why don’t you come on in yourself…” this time there was silence.  
  
Seven couldn’t hear what MC was saying but he knew that it was time. He peeked around the corner watching as the hacker smashed the knife he had into the keypad to try and break it. His anger overpowering any other emotion. As the hacker continued to lash out at the door, MC was now in the kitchen looking for the biggest knife she could find. Surely the one the hacker had would be bent into a useless heap by the time he was done. With each hit, the lock-pad slowly fizzled out. He managed to rip it off of the door completely making entry like a walk in the park.  
  
Once MC heard the door pull open she held the knife close to her side. She placed her self against the wall that couldn’t be seen from the doorway and waited. She wasn't scared, she was enjoying every bit of this. If none of it was real, then she was going to have her own fun.   
  
Saeran walked into the apartment slowly, taking in every inch of the room. “Come out, come out, wherever you are, Princess. It’s time to go to Paradise. Savior is dying to meet you.” MC rolled her eyes. “Yeah that I haven’t done, a thousand times.” She thought to herself. Once Saeran was inside Seven sprung around the corner and slowly crept up to the door. He pulled out the tranq from his pocket and slipped it into his opposite hand. He peered in, Saeran’s back to him. After a few moments, Seven made himself known.  
  
“You need to leave…” his voice was low and filled with anger. Saeran turned around, fire in his eyes. “You….” he growled. Suddenly there was an automated voice filling the apartment. “Special Security System activated. Three minuets till detonation.” Saeran’s body froze panic setting in.  
  
“What? What do you mean there’s a bomb!” his eyes glued on Sevens. “The special security system, it was Rika… it knows you’re an intruder… It’s going to kill us all if you don’t leave.” He scoffed. “You’re lying.” Suddenly MC appeared, the knife that she was holding was now clutched to her chest.  
  
“No, Saeran, we’re not.” His eyes filled with even more rage. His voice writhing in pain. MC's eyes fell on Seven's, her heart ached seeing him in the flesh. She hadn't seen him for a while, and it broke her heart knowing what kind of situation they were in. “I know everything. I know all about you, about Rika, Jihyun, Mint Eye, about Ray…” Unknown’s pulse quickened at the very name. “NO! He’s worthless… I’m the one in control… HE’S WEAK….” he screamed, his throat burning. Seven threw a confused look at MC. He didn't know who Ray was, and he was shocked just how much MC knew, but that wasn't important.   
  
MC paused and shook her head giving him the signal. “I know all too well and we’re here to stop it….” Saeran’s body was tense. “Stop what? WHAT?!” he shouted. MC moved closer, stealing all his attention. Seven slowly approached as MC spoke.

“The resets. Every time I get so much as close to finding happiness this whole godforsaken world resets. I get thrown back to day one like it’s some sick game. You wanna know how many times I’ve done your route, Saeran?” His eyebrows furrowed, he had a mix of emotions lingering on his face as MC spoke. "Route?" he spat. Everything coming out of MC's mouth sounded nothing more than crazy to him.   
  
“How many times I let you abuse me because I was so fucking tired of trying that I just gave up?” He steadied himself, opening his mouth to speak but he was quickly cut off. “That feeling that any sort of pain was worth it.” Saeran’s eyes flickered. He was undoubtedly confused. He didn’t know what twisted game the two of them were playing but he was pissed.  
  
“What are you talking about, you’re crazy!” he shouted stepping closer to MC, but before he could Seven pulled out the tranq and stabbed it into his upper shoulder. Saeran fell instantly to the ground.

MC dropped the knife and rushed to help Seven drag him out of the apartment. The Special Security system was deactivated.

* * *

  
After pulling his limp body out into the hall, the two of them sat down trying to take in what just had happened. MC’s mind stung, she tried to keep her thoughts of Saeran out of her head, but they had latched on tight. She took a deep breath and gazed over at his lifeless body. “How long?” she asked quietly. She hadn't had the chance to properly speak with Seven in what seemed like ages. 

“A few hours. We need to do something.” He said leaning slowly against the wall just outside the apartment. MC joined him.

It was quiet, the two of them unsure what to say. Everything that just happened wasn’t real. So why did any of this matter? For MC it had been about a month since the last time she was face to face with Seven. She kept purposely getting Saeran’s bad ending, hoping the torture would ease her pain. It only made it worse. She was curious how much Seven actually knew because as far as she could tell, he didn't even know who Ray was, meaning he had no idea just how serious this actually was. How seeing his body lying there, reminded her of the past, one she couldn't and refused to accept. She had played the role of coordinator but she wanted nothing more than to disappear, reawaking in Ray's arms. She loved him, and it was hard to let him go. She loved both of the Choi's and it stung knowing how fucked up all of this was. 

After what seemed like hours, Seven finally spoke up. “How many times have you chosen me?” he asked with a bit of worry in his voice. He was curious. MC was the one person who had to live through it all, she had gone through so much, and it hurt Seven to know that she was all alone when it happened.MC chuckled. “You really wanna know?” she said, her eyes avoiding his.

“I didn’t think I would count, didn’t think I actually cared. But I couldn’t stop. I became obsessed. I needed everything in my power for it to continue. I needed it so much that I didn’t care how much it hurt, as long as I got to look into…” she stopped. MC felt a sharp pain in her head. A tear rolled down her cheek. She glanced over to Seven who was looking right at her.

“As long as I got to be with you, _Saeyoung_ ” her voice trembling. His name caught in her throat, his gaze fell on her softly. His golden eyes warming her in the smallest of ways. Those eyes were the eyes of a man she was undeniably in love with. Her gaze fell back to the floor. "But, there's something... something so entirely and indescribably difficult that I don't know how to tell you, without hurting you." MC swallowed hard before taking a deep breath, she lifted her gaze and rested them softly on Sevens.   
  
"What I'm about to tell you... you might not believe me, you probably won't, I didn't at first. And I'm sorry. I can't lie about this..."  
  
Seven's heart started to race, he was scared now. "...What...?"   
  
MC's eyes felt strained, she could feel the tears threatening to escape the confines of her lash line. "Seven, I'm so sorry... but..." She choked back a sob. She really didn't want to tell him, because she knew how hurt he would end up being. But it had to be done.   
  
"There's more to this than you know. I didn't really understand it at first. Because it was different. For so long I was always tempted to Rika's apartment, I always ended up there. Then one day something changed. I can't explain how, but I knew deep down something was off. This was before I knew about the resets. I found myself receiving a message, a message from Unknown..., but he wasn't lying about a lost phone... he was different. Instead of being led to an apartment, I was led... to Mint Eye..." MC stopped, gasping as a hand was slowly placed on top of hers. She looked over to Seven, his face also stained with tears, but there was a look of warmth, he nodded for her to continue, he didn't want to interrupt, she needed to get everything out in the open.   
  
"It wasn't my choice, but something changed. Something bad. The boy I came to meet was an angel. He was pure, he was kind... he was perfect... I didn't know at the time that he was... Saeran..." She felt a bitter taste in her mouth, her eyes fell softly on his limp body. "I didn't know... and I'm sorry. Anyways, I fell so hard, so so fucking hard. I was infatuated with his being, I loved... no..." She stopped herself again. She needed to say it. But how could she? Seven squeezed her hand. You could hear the pain in his voice as he spoke. "You can say it..."   
  
MC took another deep breath. "I love him, I fucking love him... and seeing him there, out cold... it hurts like hell, Seven. I love you, you know that. I love you so fucking much, more than I can bear to take. But I love him too, and I don't know how to deal with any of this. Even after everything Saeran put me through, he abused me..." At that Seven shuddered. He didn't know just how dark Saeran was, he only could remember how he used to be. "Abused...?" he said softly, his voice cracking.   
  
MC felt guilty. Because she didn't let this happen once, she let it happen over and over and over. She thought that she deserved the pain, that perhaps the pain made it more real.   
  
"Yes... and I let him." She felt the tears break. But she kept going. "I let him torture me again and again. I had to feel something, anything. Seven, I thought I would never see you again..."   
MC dropped her head, she tightened her grip on Seven's hand. Her face covered in pain. "I did this to myself because I love you." The floodgates had opened by the time she had finished speaking. She was crying uncontrollably her sobs filling the quiet hall. Seven, who was struck with every emotion didn't know what to say, or even how to say anything that could soothe MC, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close against her body. Her chest heaving with each breath she took.   
  
Eventually, her tears ran dry. For the time being.   
  
MC held herself in his arms for a few moments, letting their warmth try to soothe the underlying ache that had taken over her. "I... need to keep going." She suddenly said. MC took another countless deep breath. "This will be even harder to hear, perhaps. So please, just please, listen..." Seven found her hand once again and held it in his own, he slowly ran his thumb over her palm, trying anything to keep her calm no matter how bad the situation was.   
  
"Back to what you asked earlier... about how many times, I picked you... Nothing was ever okay. Because...every fucking time I would be happy enough, it would all disappear and you would forget about everything we once had. Eventually, I stopped trying. One time, I didn’t even pick up my phone, because the thought of living on any longer just to see you disappear? That hurt me like nothing has ever before. I just ignored it, I wouldn't let myself go through that again. Everything was frozen but it was peaceful. It didn’t last long, because I missed you. I missed him. I wanted to reset, I wanted to go back and do it all over, just for the both of you. It fucking hurt and I couldn’t stand the loneliness. So I gave in, and I let myself come crawling back to Saeran, you... everyone. It wasn't just between you and your brother... I had a life with everyone. And they don't even know it... But I let myself hurt because it meant I got to be with you. I didn’t know how much longer I could stand it though. It got to the point where I wanted to just disappear. I thought that if I… if I somehow stopped the pain everything would be better. But nothing worked. I tried so many ways and it just….” MC’s eyes were filled with tears once again. "I'm sorry, I'm so weak..."   
  
"You're not weak. Don't say that. EVER." His voice rattled with pain. His tears had come just as fast as they had gone. Everything was one big fucking mess and MC wasn't sure if there was any way to stop it. Seven's heart burned at the sight of her, she was shattered. For so long she had suffered through this alone, and that burden sank heavily over him. She was coming undone. She was fractured from head to toe. MC clutched onto Seven’s arm, her fingers gripping the soft jacket with frustration. She could smell his essence, her mind was an array but she needed the contact. Anything to keep her stable.  
  
"...I'm sorry... and... what I'm about to say... it's not going to be easy... there's so much pain in me and I need to tell you all of it... I need you to know how much I suffered without you..."   
Seven pulled MC closer into him, he whispered soft endearments as she sat there shaking from the pain. "Please, don't hate me for what I'm about to say..."   
  
She swallowed hard. 

“The first time I tried to kill myself…” she instantly felt Seven’s chest quiver, he squeezed her hand even tighter. He watched MC fumble with her words before she spoke.  
  
“I even wrote a goodbye letter to you. I didn’t know if it would work, so I needed to let you know… that after I was gone that I had loved you the most. That you were always the one. That no matter how much I loved Saeran, I loved you more..."  
  
MC furrowed her brows before she spoke.   
  
"I took a knife... I was gonna do it where it hurt the most. It didn’t go as planned, I ended up chickening out but it wasn’t long till I actually did it. I was praying all the pain would stop. I let myself slip away, but when I woke up. I knew that I was eternally screwed. I slit my own wrists, I hung myself, I poisoned myself, I even jumped out of the fucking window. Nothing worked. Nothing stopped the pain I was feeling.”   
  
Seven's body tightened around MC's and he started to cry, a little harder than he already was. "MC... I'm... sorry..." She shook her head. "It's not your fault, it's no one's fault. Maybe it's mine... I did this to myself, didn't I?" she sighed, a small laugh escaping her lips.   
  
"This is all just a game, right? So I guess, it doesn't really matter then... That's why today, I thought why not fuck around. Maybe confuse you. I didn't want to hurt you, I couldn't, but I was so fed up that I needed to make you know I was suffering. But the pain? It’s all part of the game right? All part of a sick game. I’m still so fucking exhausted. But when I saw you call I actually felt happy, for once. I needed you to hear me, and I wasn’t sure if I would ever get to you. But something changed. I have heard you repeat that same BS call over and over and over. When I heard you moving, I knew something was off. Once you told me you knew. My heart shattered. This indescribable pain ran through my every nerve. I felt like I wasn’t alone anymore. I felt like I was going to be fine. Because I had the one person I loved by my side.”  
  
Seven’s eyes were stained with tears, he had stopped crying but there was evidence all over his face. She took a deep breath and chuckled. “I'm sorry I’m such a fucking mess, I’m sorry….” she trailed off. Seven shook his head endlessly.  
  
“Never apologize. Don’t you ever say sorry.” MC slowly turned around, her hands resting gently on Seven's chest. Her eyes locked onto his, their face only an inch apart. He saw the pain in her eyes. He gently grabbed her face, hands cupping her soft features and then he slowly pulled her forward to close the gap, the kiss was warm and MC melted into Seven’s body. They held the kiss for a few moments before breaking apart.  
  
“I love you so much, MC….” He said, gently stroking the back of his finger against her soft skin. “I love you too, I love you so much. I never want to leave you ever again, I don’t care, I need this to stop. I need it to end. I need a life with you... and Saeran...that won’t last 11 days. I need forever.”   
  
Seven looked over at Saeran, then back at MC. “I promise, I will do everything to make this right. Let’s get Saeran home and then we need to tell the others… It’s going to be hard. Extremely hard. You’re going to have to tell them about your relationships with them, it’s only fair.” Seven squeezed MC’s hand tight. “I believe in you because I know how caring you are. You always worry about us before yourself. It's not going to be easy, because no one is going to believe us. But I'll be by your side, through it all. I promise.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
After what seemed like forever, MC and Seven managed to get Saeran’s limp body into the car. The drive to the bunker was long, MC took a nap from the emotional strain she felt and Saeran laid in the back practically lifeless. Halfway through the trip, Seven received a call. He pulled his phone out from his back pocket and when he saw the caller ID he started to get nervous. This call was unusual, this person never called. Not without reason. He hesitated for a moment before answering.  
  
“V…” he said softly. Trying to hold back worry. “Saeyoung? We need to speak in private. It’s something important. You'll know where to meet me, five pm sharp. I’ll be waiting.” V hung up. Seven’s heart started to race and he began to drive a lot faster, hoping he could get Saeran and MC home safely.  
  
Eventually, Seven was pulling his car into his brightly lit garage that was filled with other expensive sports cars all sporting different colors. He gently woke MC, reassuring her that she was safe. MC yawned as she took in her surroundings realizing she was in Seven’s garage. “I’ve missed your babies.” She softly chuckled still a bit sleepy. Seven threw her a warm smile before motioning to the back door. “Help me get him out. I have somewhere I can keep him.” MC nodded. Before she came to the other side of the car she stretched a bit, making a soft "mm" sound, causing Seven to chuckle. She pulled open the door, pushing Saeran up towards Seven, who slung him over his shoulder.  
  
MC hadn’t been in Seven’s house for quite a while, she took a deep breath as she stepped in after him. A small tear cascading her cheek. Seven disappeared down a dimly lit hallway as MC took everything in. She gently touched everything that she could see. Everything that she came to know all too well. Although it had been ages since she last had stepped foot inside the bunker, MC tried to consume the visuals all at once.

With each reset came new memories, but they came and went so quickly it hurt her now to even stand there. She recalled the good times that they both shared, the laughing, the crying, the everything in-between. MC walked over to the couch, she sank into it, curling her knees to her chest. She didn't understand why any of this was happening. How any of it was possible. How? How was she not _real?_ She couldn't fathom how incredibly crazy it sounded. That everything was a lie. It didn't matter what she did because apparently, 11 days was all she had. And then it would be over. But this time... it had to end. She would make sure of it.   
  
While MC was alone to tend to her thoughts, Seven had managed to get Saeran into his spare bedroom. He wasn't awake, but the moment he was, all hell would break loose. Seven knew this already and he had done the best he could. He even handcuffed him to the bed to keep him somewhat restrained. He wasn't himself and Seven could tell he had lost himself a long time ago.   
  
Seven returned shortly finding MC curled up on the couch, his expression dropped and he could tell she was having a hard time being here. Seeing the lost memories of the past. He pulled her into his body, his familiar scent making her smile. Although she was happy at that moment she still found her eyes betraying her, a few tears trickled down her cheek. She sighed. She felt uneasy, and she wasn't sure if it was the fact that after everything she was stuck in a never-ending loop of torture or that she was here right now, with someone she cherished more than anything in the world. MC glanced around the living room once more before she could speak her thoughts.   
  
“It’s hard, you know? Seeing all this? Remembering everything we had together, every time the world would reset, every time I came crawling back to you, to make you love me. Because I couldn’t live without you. It burns so fucking bad and knowing that we might not be able to fix it… I don’t know how much longer I can handle it….” More tears broke free. Seven gripped her tighter, he used his thumb to wipe away her stained face, whispering soft murmurs into her ear. Eventually, the tears subsided and her body slowed, her breathing was steady and she nudged herself closer into Sevens’ body.  
  
“Where’s Saeran?” she finally asked.  
  
“I hate to do this to him, but he has no idea what’s even going on so I had to lock him up. It’s for his own safety.” MC sniffled.  
  
“Yeah… that’s good…” she said softly.   
  
“How do we tell them….? How do I tell them? This is just…. I know I can do it. I have to… but… how do I look four people who barely know me, in the eyes, and tell them, I loved them, that they loved me, that we had a life together, that everything we know is fake, it’s a game…. how. How do I-…. how do we convince them?” she sighed. “I just want everyone to be happy…”  
  
Seven looked down at MC, his beautiful face glowing like it always did. “We will do it together… maybe.. just maybe, there’s a way we can elicit a memory that will help them remember… we have to let them remember. Otherwise, they’ll stay victims of this sick game we’re trapped in…”  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading~ 
> 
> I know this is kind of a mess, and I can always go back and fix things but I really do hope you enjoyed, at least the concept of what I'm going for. I don't know exactly how this going to pan out but I'm sure the idea will come to me eventually.


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